By: Shantanu Das Sharma, Sr. Associate Editor, ICN Group
New Series of NLP+ Lifestyle
KOLKATA: Welcome you to this brand new series of NLP+ Lifestyle articles for YOU to multiply your success at least ten times by applying Neuro-Linguistic Programming in your life. Your intention is important. And it is enough to begin this wonderful journey of transformation. May you prosper better and better!!!
Quick Recap of Part 1
You Can Be Successful Today
The Rules that Winners Play By
Every Step Back is a Learning Experience
Only You Can Allow Yourself to Fail!
Why People Fear Setting Goals and Dreaming Big
So many people never realize their potential and achieve anything in life because they never dare to dream and go for their dreams. It is not because they have less courage or determination than successful individuals. It is because of the way they have defined success and failure to themselves. Their ‘rules’ of what success means has created self-sabotage.
Many people have been taught to believe that they are successful ONLY WHEN they achieve their goals and conversely if they don’t achieve it then they are a failure.
Since most people are afraid of failures, they avoid setting goals! In their mind, they believe that if they set a goal and don’t make it, they will be setting themselves up for failure – one of the most painful experiences a person imagines they can have. If they don’t set any goals or have any kind of expectations, then they can never fail. It is this kind of non-action thinking that robs them of the power to dream.
Even if they set goals, they will avoid setting big ones. They rather set small, puny goals that they think they can achieve and feel successful. Setting big goals and not getting there would again mean the pain of failure. Once again, this belief robs them of the power of thinking big and achieving big.
Success Does Not Happen by Chance, But By Choice
Understand that success does not happen by chance. You do not wake up one day and suddenly find yourself financially free. You do not wake up one day and find that you have a high level of fitness and health. You do not wake up one day and find yourself at the top of your career. It just does not happen this way. And yet many people leave their success to chance and just ‘hope’ it would happen someday.
Success is the result of first deciding on exactly what you want. It is the result of setting a specific goal today and taking actions every day towards that desired outcome. Every step you take towards that goal is counted as ‘success’.
For example, if you want to be financially successful, you have to decide on what it means to be financially successful. What is the specific outcome you want? Is it to accumulate a net-worth of Rs.50 Lacs in 10 years, or to be debt free, or to have passive income of Rs.50,000 a month?
The very moment you set that goal and start to take action towards it, that is when your journey of success is in progress. To ultimately reach that goal, you have to succeed in taking daily actions towards it, creating greater value in your career, building new income streams, managing your expenses, saving your money, investing in the right assets, managing your investments etc.
Or take a successful marriage…
How do some people get married and stay happily married and passionately excited about each other, even after 30 years? Why do some couples, on the other hand, fall out of love in less than 5 years? Passion, love and trust – the Super Glue that both holds marriage together – doesn’t happen by chance. Not at all. I have found that the couples who stay successfully and happily married for a long time are able to do so because they take the daily actions to support, communicate, surprise and love each other.
When they have misunderstanding and quarrels, they make the effort to work it out, compromise and will not allow themselves to go to bed angry. These are successful steps they take daily that produce the overall success in their relationship over time!
Success Can Only Happen When You Decide What You Want
If success is defined as a daily process of moving towards your goals, then we must first be clear about what our goals are. If you do not define what your goals are, then how can you tell if the actions you take daily are moving in the right directions or not? Without goals, success is impossible.
Imagine playing a soccer game without knowing where the goal post is. You won’t know where to run to or which direction to aim the ball at. Without a goal post, you cannot keep score on the game and tell if you are winning or losing.
It may sound absurd to play a ball game without knowing where the goal post is. However, isn’t this way most people play their game of life? Many people never decide what they really want; what their goals are. As a result, they take sporadic actions, in all directions and end up achieving nothing.
Decide On What You Want
So, start yourself on your journey of success by getting clear on what you want. Take a few minutes to write down the goals you want to achieve in the major areas of your life; your career; your marriage / family, your finances and your health.
To be effective, your goals have to be as specific and measurable as possible. The clearer you can envision the outcome in your mind, the more likely you will achieve it. For example, don’t just write down that you want to achieve a higher income. Write down a specific figure that excites & motivates you (i.e Rs.120 Lakhs a year in income). Describe as detailed as possible the kind of marriage you see yourself having 5-10 years from now. Always set a specific deadline to each goal you set.
Most people avoid making big and specific goals because of the fear of not achieving it. This lack of commitment is what precisely robs them of their personal power. Remember that you are successful as long as you go for it 100% ! You can never fail unless you quit or not even give it a ‘shot’. So dare to dream big and go for it with all your heart.
My Career & Business Goals_________________________________________
My Marriage or Family Goals ________________________________________
My Health Goals___________________________________________________
My Financial Goals ________________________________________________
Shantanu Das Sharma, Creator of the concept NLP Lifestyle Coaching with NLP+ and Founder of Neuromind Leadership Academy is an Amazon #1 Best Selling Author, NLP+ Lifestyle Master Trainer & Coach, C-Suite Coach, First Certified Social Panorama Consultant in Eastern India directly trained under Dr. Lucas Derks, Kolkata Emissary of Mental Space Psychology, Clean Language Facilitator & Strategic Interventionist.